POLICE LINE DO NOT CROSS

District 4: 650 Harrison Avenue, 617-343-4457

District A-1: 40 New Sudbury Street, 617-343-4627

A Bright Thief

Bright means colors, not IQ.

At about 1:30pm on July 6, our men in blue arrived at H&M at 100 Newbury Street to investigate a shoplifting.

Seems a white male in his thirties and about 6 feet tall had stolen several items. He was wearing nondescript all neon yellow/green clothing to blend in. He lifted a maroon jacket to highlight his wardrobe, tan and white T-shirts, costume jewelry and sunglasses.

The guy either needs a color coordinator or a role in a Fellini movie.

I Can’t Here You Now

Remember the old Verizon cellphone commercial?

On July 6 around 4:45pm, a suspect entered the Verizon store at 745 Boylston Street and asked a sales associate for a $200 prepaid phone. He was told that the company doesn’t offer phones in that price range and was shown several phones on display.

Apparently finding the device he liked, the shoplifter produced a pair of wire cutters and cut the security cable on a Samsung Galaxy S22 phone valued at $1,200 and then fled on Boylston Street towards the Boston Public Library.

Little did he realize that he was about to enter a perpetual dead zone as his new toy was disabled, rendering it useless.

His next heist will be more practical: two tin cans attached with a string.

Wanting an Autograph?

The Lyric Stage at 140 Clarendon Street is known for stimulating plays and great actors. There are some fans, though, that will do anything involving the theater.

On July 8, police responded to a possible breaking and entering at this cultural epicenter. A homeless man had been caught sleeping in a theater office where he may have been residing since July 2. No property was stolen or damaged nor was there forced entry.

A Poor Soul

Officers responded to Charlesgate West at about 4:30am on July 9 to deal with an apparent opiate overdose. The victim was blue and barely breathing until two does of NARCAN brought him back to consciousness.

He was transported to the Beth Israel for further treatment and evaluation.

A Cool (Stolen) Jeep

A really, really cool jeep was “stolen” near 181 Newbury Street on July 9 between 1:30-3:30pm.

The owner had customized his black Jeep Wrangler with fender flares, large tires, red accent hooks, winch, oversized bumpers and off-road red lighting, Rocky Ridge logo in the front window and leather interior seats with Rocky Ridge logo stitched into the head rests.

Later that afternoon, the embarrassed owner phoned D4 to apologize. He had found his vehicle at 137 Newbury Street where he had actually parked it. There’s no word on how much the overtime parking will cost.

We’re a little bummed as the jeep would have been cool driving around Nantucket between issues of The Boston Guardian.